Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Sweet relief.

Habits are hard to break. I used to write to Suzanne all the time. Like a War and Peace worth of words over the last couple of years.

We quit writing to each other more or less cold turkey, though our output had definitely started to fall.

Here's a fact. I think she actually called me (not texts) maybe 10 times over those two years, and I think I am being generous.

Why? You ask. Why would you stay with her? To you I say: You had to be there. A connection is a connection, even if it comes with more baggage than the Darjeeling Limited.

I love this girl, yes I do. Yes, the one who for all intents and purposes dumped me with such a seemingly cool demeanor that I later assumed she was in a suicidal state. I was wrong. Later I learned that 'after a couple of weeks of self pity and too much chocolate she was moving on' (paraphrase, I will never use real quotes or dates or names or details to keep this nice and generic)... Really?

She couldn't be there for me, and by be there for me I mean go out and meet some of my friends, or go away for a weekend, or go out shopping...

She limited our relationship so much.... and then acted like I wasn't holding up my end of the bargain. I wasn't, true, but that's cause she wasn't even admitting that any bargain had ever been struck. One day I will tell the story of the heart tatoos.


Anyway, she has my number. I am moving on though, got a couple of birds in my net if you catch the drift, I just know that if anything starts to happen I will again be buried in thoughts of Suzanne....

Freedom, please. Or babies with me.
I keep wishing I had punctured a couple condoms, which is SICK. Cause that baby would be born into a shit-storm of poopy proportions.

<3 <3

She is so good at compartmentalizing, it is actually bad for her. I myself need to not worry about her though, as she left me. I need to move on.

Serious about these other girls though, some interesting folks, and both really pretty... and blonde!!!

(let the record show I have a history of dating brunettes almost exclusively)


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